More share buttons
Share on Pinterest
There are no images.

24 Reasons You Should Never Own A Tortoise

Share on Pinterest
There are no images.

They’re just the worst.

Everyone knows that tortoises are ugly.

They’re just not cute at all.

From the moment they’re born.

Right up until old age.

They’re completely unadorable.

I mean look at them.

Super Kai 🎈#superhero #sulcatatortoise #sky #tortoisesofinstagram

A photo posted by @skynkai on

Who’d want this staring back at them each day?

And they’re the least photogenic animals of all time.

They don’t get on with other animals.

And they’re terrible around children.

Hell, they don’t even get on with each other.

#pet #tortoises #pinky #perky #pinkyandperky #spurthighed #🐢 #may15

A photo posted by @scoops642 on

It’s no wonder they’re always looking so sad.

They hate the outdoors.

Look out world, Paddy's loose in #kalorama 🐢 #paddygram #tortoisesofinstagram?

A photo posted by Ryan Ferguson 🇺🇸 (@ryanoferguson) on

So you can’t take them anywhere.

Just look at how unadorable they look while eating.

Hibiscus leaves are yummy! 🍃😋

A photo posted by @tina.thetortoise on

And messy.

Plus they have zero chill.

They make lousy friends.

Sir William and I just chillin' #tortoise #grass #friendship #chill #workinghard #tortoisesofinstagram #herpetology

A photo posted by Alex Lee (@alexanderthegreat1991) on

They’re so antisocial.

This mornings staff meeting.

A photo posted by Global Geckos Reptile Shop (@globalgeckosreptileshop) on

And are completely incapable of having fun.

They have a weak selfie game.

Not to mention how terrible they look in a hat.

Rick the desert tortoise. #deserttortoise #tortoise #tortoisesofinstagram

A photo posted by ~East Valley Reptiles~ (@eastvalleyreptiles) on


Do you think he likes his ugly Christmas sweater? Least he sleeps on💲💯s. #TortoisesofInstagram

A photo posted by Misty Kingma (@mistykingma) on

So why would anyone want one?